Saturday, February 23, 2008

Sights + Sounds of the Day





I always said that after I finished my two books, I would clean (H)ouse and streamline my CD, vinyl and DVD collections. One of the soul-crippling side effects of doing what I do for a living is that it can turn your love into a fucking chore. You start to collect and perceive culture as an anthropologist or a librarian (no diss, Reggie, you know I have love for you and much respect for your gig.) That fan component, where you're sprawled in your underwear on your sofa, eyes closed or staring up at the ceiling lost in the notes, spiraling through the groove, listening not to take notes or to formulate a thesis, but for the same reasons that ancestors chanted and sang and danced... prayed... those reasons get gone. And a recent writing gig for "corporate forces" has left me incredibly demoralized about writing and the slim prospects of earning a living at it as an actual "writer" and not just someone's ad copy ho. Particularly when it's "black culture" that's being bottled. I've long joked that I split writing gigs into two categories: those that feed mind, spirit and soul, and let me actually write (those gigs are increasingly rare and when they do come about, they do not pay) and what I call sucking dick in filthy alleys for cheeseburgers and rocks. Blah, blah, blah and other cliches. This is an age-old struggle, not especially interesting to anyone but the struggler. But the books are done, I've sucked off the corporate trick this week (hey, mister, have ya got a dime / yo, mister, do you wanna spend some time), and I'm sitting here listening to Ultra Nate, planning to come back from the upcoming promotional jaunt back east and reclaim my living space, take back my head space, try to detox and get back to loving and not hating "writing." Pack up most of the hip-hop taking up precious space on my shelves (cannot.do.it.anymore), thin out the DVDs, and get back on track.

(Thank you, Pato. These CDs are amaaaaaaaaazing.)

1 comment:

Joey said...

Well just know that for every soul crippling task you take on listening/experience all that you do - when you share something that your passionate about - something that I would NEVER ever come across in my way too ordinary life in LA - it's massively appreciated. It's why I read your words.

Plus, you're the only other person I know who appreciates E. Lewis as much as I do.